Oops, My Bad

The saying goes that everyone makes mistakes. That is true. We all do. So, how come when you make a mistake, you feel so alone?

In addition to feeling embarrassed or angry at yourself, or that you are a bad person, there is a real sense that you are the only one who has ever screwed up so badly. You just feel like no one else can possibly be a stupid as you, no one would ever do the "horrible" thing you did. And, so (unless you have no conscience, in which case none of this applies) the beating yourself up begins. You go over it and over it in your mind, thinking of all the things you could have done differently, and replaying the gory details of it, just to really make sure you feel bad enough. Because, clearly you are evil and need to suffer.

Now, of course, with a little perspective, we would all realize that unless someone is dead, physically injured, or worse, no slip up is the end of the world. Be it a huge gaffe at work that makes your boss turn eight shades of red. Or the foot-in-the-mouth moment at the in-laws. Or, the worst of all, hurting someone you truly care about and love with your thoughtlessness.

So, how do you get over the mistake and move on, without spending countless hours depressed and hurting yourself. Great question. And, the truth is, I don't really know for sure. I am far too likely to stew about things for far too long, making myself the villain in every scene. And, maybe I am, but I really don't think so. So, to all that I have wronged, please forgive me. But more importantly, I forgive myself. Try it sometime, it feels pretty good.