For some reason, everyone wants to talk about death lately. Recently, I was at work and my boss said something I found interesting. He said that when someone dies, it "makes us think about our own mortality." All I could think was that he had obviously never lost anyone close to him.
Sure, in the abstract, someone dying, be it a star or even someone you know a little bit, makes us think about our own death. But, when you lose someone important to you, it's not a reminder. It's not "a shame." It is a total and complete devastation. It doesn't make you think "Oh shit, I'm going to die some day." It stops everything. It means that the person you love and lived with is never walking through the door again. No more plans to be made, no more good times. It's all over. That is not abstract. It is pain, and it is real. I don't wish the pain of loss on anyone, but when I hear people make pithy comments about death, it makes me furious.
I am far beyond the point where death is an abstract concept in my life. I don't need a reminder of my own mortality. In fact, most people I know have felt far more devastation and pain than anyone deserves. Dying is unfathomable. I know people say silly things to comfort themselves and others. But, there is no comfort. Except maybe time, and for some, that is debatable. And, that is the sad lesson everyone will learn someday.
MGL - 10/45 - 4/06
1 comment:
I'm with you Inky...when someone I know loses someone close to them all I can think about is how devasting it must be for them - since I know how devasting it was for me. And about how long it will take for their life to be somewhat "normal" again - if it ever really is.
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